Dear Dr. Perfect,

I am troubled by the current top trend in porn. What consenting adults do behind closed doors or in front of cameras streaming across the world wide web of iniquity should be for no one to judge. 

But judge I must. 

Incest porn shows the moral collapse of our country and globe. Video after video after video shows stepsiblings engaged in all manner of sexual activity. 

Stepsibling porn isn’t even incest porn. Whither integrity?

Signed,

A concerned pervert

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Dear pervert,

Keen societal gatekeepers like you expose the fallacies of our modern age in just as important ways as porn performers expose their carnal areas. 

You might be on to something, as this isn’t the first letter I’ve received on so-called incest porn.

The actors aren’t related. This sub-genre just another taboo trope meant to elicit faint arousal among viewers who enjoy those kinds of fetishized fantasies, just like unlikely impromptu sex with the delivery driver, the repairman, the gym instructor, the teacher, the civil service worker, or any other porn scenario.

Take comfort that step-sibling porn will soon be considered old-fashioned at our current rate of moral decay. And we can be sure that the adult entertainment wizards come up with next will be in even higher definition.

Alas, gone are the halcyon days of magazines, videos, and seedy XXX movie theaters.

With all this tech, our desires for companionship have only intensified. Computer-generated AI partners offering millions of lonely people (men) a tender ear via their phone app. Once the sex robots hit the market, human kind’s future becomes anyone’s guess. We all saw it coming with the advent of the inflatable sheep. I can only express mild disapproval of our imperfections. If the world was as perfect as I am, there’d be no purpose to my advice columns, so it all evens out.

I’m surprised the porn industry hasn’t ventured into space yet. They could pack a bunch of actors into a rocket and launch it to Mars. Just imagine a blanket of space colonies, transmitting adult films back to Earth. Consider the possibilities: Weightless sex, space rover sex, warp-speed sex, and sex on the moon . What about the Milky Way or the Black Hole? These euphemisms need to happen.

Fear not, concerned pervert. Step-sibling porn will soon be as relevant as fidget-spinners. It’s all business, a simple transaction between you (the consumer) and the strangers you’re watching having photogenic sex. If porn ever emphasized realism, the industry would most likely crash overnight.

No one wants to see normal people having sex. 

That’s not filth; it’s just weird.

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Dr. Perfect has slung advice across the globe for the last two decades due to his dedication to the uplift of the human condition.