The Lists #6 as told to John King

Upcoming Offerings from

MAGIC MONKEY’S PUMPKIN HOUR (In 3-D)

When Magic Monkey polishes its pumpkin, the stem spits out seeds that are diamonds, that each contain a glistening parable starring medieval Japanese babies. Dubbed into Icelandic from the Original Japanese.

 COMPETITIVE EATING TODAY

Track the calories of the world’s hungriest competitors via satellite. Our commentators will place each dietary category in its proper competitive context.

PLANTATION COOKING WITH PAULA DEEN

Butter! Butter! Butter! Butter! Butter! Butter! Butter!

 BREAKDANCING THE OKEEFENOKEE

A new reality series about the slow entry of this amazing trend into the swamps of Southern Georgia.

FUCKWIT ISLAND

The return of the hit reality series.  Two tribes of homicidal, illiterate teenagers (one tribe worships Taylor Swift, the other Justin Bieber) compete to save the soul of an iPhone.

A Terrible Channel Original Movie: KILLING BILL O’REILLY

Historians of Abraham Lincoln, John F. Kennedy, Jesus Christ, and General George S. Patton send a cadre of orangutans with tire irons to assassinate the beloved pundit. Based on a true story.

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John King (Episode, well, all of them) is a podcaster, writer, and ferret wrangler.