The Lists #31 by John King

New Year’s Resolutions

  1. Annihilate my persona. Use weapons if necessary.
  2. Shave off all my body hair, including eyebrows.
  3. Form an avant-garde Mariachi band.
  4. Become a professional spelunker.
  5. Explore Leon Redbone in mandala form.
  6. Eat more blueberries.
  7. Eat more blueberries.
  8. Re-edit Eyes Wide Shut, so the lightsaber duels are put back into the story.
  9. Eat more blueberries.



John King (Episode, well, all of them) holds a PhD in English from Purdue University, and an MFA from New York University. He has reviewed performances for Shakespeare Bulletin.