The Lists #1 by John King
FORTHCOMING FILMS IN THE DIE HARD FRANCHISE
DIE HARD AS NAILS
When his granddaughter’s hamster goes missing, John McClane must take the yakuza down.
On a honeymoon in Cozumel with his twenty-three year old bride, John McClane must protect her from a gambling cartel that is using bullfighting to extort the prime minister of Finland.
DIE HARD AND FAST
John McClane squints, smirks, and bleeds from his elderly muscles while cinematographers take shaky close-ups of incomprehensible action sequences involving bazookas, motorized unicycles, and the International Space Station.
DIE HARD AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL
John McClane pursues a terrorist cell of genetic engineers after Shia Lebouef claims to be his son.
DIE HARD AT HEART
John McClane must be miniaturized to combat micro-terrorists (led by the former prime minister of Finland’s cousin) who are threatening his wife’s life via her bloodstream.
DIE HARD TO SWALLOW
John McClane eats a bran muffin.
DIE HARD TO DIE HARD
John McClane must travel to the future to stop John McClane from killing the former prime minister of Finland’s nephew while mountain climbing in the Swiss Alps.
John King (Episode, well, all of them) is a podcaster, writer, and ferret wrangler.