The shurikens were flying fast and furious in the direction of the red Ducati. One of them pierced the shoulder of the rider. The motorcycle buckled and swerved as the assassin of the Banana-Man failed to keep control.  The next thing I saw was the rider pitching headfirst into a road sign for the Golden Corral, a sign that enticed tourists with the promise of a fully stocked buffet that included cotton candy just like the kind you had grown up with. We’d soon find out if the assassin was still alive and willing to talk.

— To be continued. 

Tonight’s movie is 1973’s Enter the Dragon from director Robert Clouse. This is the movie where Bruce Lee and John Saxon received equal billing in the title credits. It’s kind of like when Steve McQueen and Paul Newman needed to have equal billing on The Towering Inferno due the egos of the two actors (or their agents). And if you’re expecting kung fu action from Mr. Saxon, you’ll get it along with Mr. Bruce Lee and karate champion Jim Kelly. No Chuck Norris this time around. 

Bruce Lee plays a man named Lee, a kung fu master at a Shaolin temple in Hong Kong. After witnessing Lee win a match, do a triple jump in the air, and berate a student for missing all of that heavenly glory, a British Intelligence officer named Braithwaite requests that Lee help them take out a super villain named Han (Shih Kien). They need evidence of Han’s criminal activities that include opium selling, kidnapping, and prostitution. Han lives on an island fortress with an army of kung fu commandos at his command. The only way one can get inside is with an invitation to his martial arts tournament, an invitation Lee just happened to receive.

We have two other martial heroes along for the ride in this adventure, Roper (John Saxon) and Williams (Jim Kelly). Roper is a compulsive gambler that owes six figures to the mob so Han’s tournament is his best way of escaping his debt collectors. Williams is just interested in winning and “looking good” while doing it. Lee has a more personal reason for entering the tournament beyond civic duty. He wants revenge against Han for the death of his sister and for dishonoring the Shaolin Temple. Han used to be a Shaolin monk, but left and used his newfound mystical knowledge for evil purposes.

Han is extra evil. He kidnaps stewardesses and cocktail waitresses, gets them hooked on narcotics so he can force them into prostitution so they can get their next fix. In a private meeting, Han reveals to Roeper his criminal empire is investing in corruption and he wants Roper to represent his organization in the United States. Roper doesn’t go for it because Han likes to hang up the bodies of those that defy him. Roper has his limits and those limits are torture and murder.

I have to wonder what it was like to be sitting in a theater in the early 1970s and watching the climatic final fight of Enter the Dragon where all hell is breaking loose with dozens martial artists fighting each other as Lee pursues the evil Han. Our super villian lost his right hand some time ago and uses prosthetic implements such as blades and claws to subdue his prey. The final fight between Hand and Lee takes place in a hall of mirrors and is not to be missed. This concludes Bruce Lee Month here at the Museum of Schlock, but perhaps we’ll revisit him again next year.

Jeff Shuster (episode 47, episode 102, episode 124, episode 131, episode 284, episode 441, episode 442, episode 443, episode 444, episode 450, episode 477, episode 491, episode 492, episode 493, episode 495, episode 496, episode 545, episode 546, episode 547, episode 548, episode 549, episode 575, episode 596, episode 597, episode 598, episode 599, episode 642, episode 643, episode 644, episode 645, and episode 670) is an MFA graduate from the University of Central Florida.