Welcome to Week 2 of Batman Month here at the Museum of Schlock. This week’s feature is 2019’s Batman vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from director Jake Castorena. Many of you will be disappointed as there is no scene of Batman hogtying Leonardo as he cries out “April! April!” Batman would then proceed to slice Leonardo’s head off as the name April means nothing to him. Perhaps if Zack Snyder had been available, but, alas, that movie does not exist. 

But who cares, we get a scene of Batman (Troy Baker) fighting the Shredder (Andrew Kishino), the greatest super villain to ever come from a comic book! Guess what? Batman loses his first encounter with the Shredder, even gets some ribs broken. It takes four Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to take on this guy so one Batman ain’t cutting it. I mean it’s not as humiliating as Batman’s battle with Bane, but he definitely is out of his league with this evil ninja master. 

The movie begins with a group of ninjas that we in the audience know as the Foot Clan stealing a piece of scientific equipment. Barbara Gordon (AKA Batgirl) witnesses the theft and the ninjas through the haze of smoke bombs the Foot Clan let loose. She also notices four turtle-like ninjas with the others and assumes they are working together. Batgirl (Rachel Bloom) informs Batman of the theft and he vows that these turtles will regret coming to Gotham City.

These four Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are Donatello (Baron Vaughn), the serious leader, Raphael (Darren Criss), the hothead, Donatello (Baron Vaughn), the tech genius, and Michelangelo (Kyle Mooney), the goofball. They travelled from New York City to stop whatever foul deeds Shredder and the Foot Clan are up to. They first encounter the Penguin (Tom Kenny) and his goons attempting to rob Wayne Enterprises of some tech equipment. The Penguin thinks the Turtles are the Batman at first, but Raphael asks, “Do I look like a freaking bat to you?” Michelangelo is fascinated by the Penguin’s array umbrella weapons.

It’s not long before the four brothers tussle with the Dark Knight himself, but the four turtles retreat to figure out how to deal with this new adversary. Both sides believe each other to be the enemy and Donatello manages to pinpoint the exact location of the Batcave which they reach by swimming underneath it. While investigating the Batcave, they have another skirmish, this time with young Robin (). Eventually, Batman, Batgirl, Robin, and the Ninja Turtles realize they’re on the same side, which is a good thing considering Shredder and the Foot Clan have allied themselves with Ra’s al Ghoul (Cas Anvar) and the League of Shadows. Shredder wants access to the Lazarus Pit so he may live forever like Ra’s al Ghoul. Ra’s al Ghoul wants access to mutagen for his plan to destroy Gotham City. Mutagen combined with Joker Venom will turn everyone in Gotham into crazed mutants. 

Both the Shredder and Ra’sal Ghul visit Arkham Asylum where they make a deal with Joker (Troy Baker). In exchange for his Joker venom, the Shredder will turn all the inmates in Gotham into mutant versions of themselves. For example, Mr. Freeze (John DiMaggio) turns into a mutant polar bear while the Scarecrow (Jim Meskimen) turns into a mutant crow. Batman, Batgirl, Robin, and the four Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles have to then fight their way through the Joker (who is now a mutant snake) and the other crazed inmates of Arkham Asylum. Many members of Batman’s rogue’s gallery make an appearance in this movie, but it doesn’t feel overstuffed. In fact, what we get is one of the better Batman efforts and probably the best Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie ever made. If you were a kid in the late 1980s or early 1990s, you owe it to yourself to check out this ultimate team up.

Jeff Shuster (episode 47, episode 102, episode 124, episode 131, episode284, episode 441, episode 442, episode 443,episode 444, episode 450,episode 477, episode 491, episode 492,episode 493, episode 495, episode 496, episode 545, episode 546, episode 547, episode 548, episode 549, episode 575, episode 596, episode 597, episode 598, episode 599, episode 642, episode 643, episode 644, episode 645, episode 670, episode 686, episode 687,  688, and 689) is an MFA graduate from the University of Central Florida.