A Happy 4^th of July to all the many patrons of the Museum of Schlock. We’ll be having an outside prize fight between Edwige, my kangaroo companion from my misadventures in North America, and a gorilla named Morrie on loan from a local crypto bro. We’ll have free firecrackers for the kids. Buy one, get one free on Blue Hawaiians too. Looking forward to seeing y’all. 

Tonight’s movie is Pee-wee’s Big Adventure from director Tim Burton and yes, it holds up as well now as it did in 1985. The late Paul Reubens’ comic timing is brilliant and there’s so much going on in this 90-minute feature.

A little bit of research shows us that the great Phil Hartman had worked on this screenplay.

Why is this movie so special? It’s a series of vignettes showing Pee-wee Herman’s (Paul Reubens) frantic search for his stolen bicycle that takes him on a journey to San Antonio, TX to find out if it’s in the basement of the Alamo. What I love about this movie:

Pee-wee’s House

I read online once that Pee-wee’s house is every 6-year-old’s dream house and for good reason. He has a fire pole in his bedroom leading to easy access to the first floor. He has a fortune dispensing machine in his bathroom. His kitchen is filled with animatronic contraptions that seem like they were pulled straight out of Herbie Hancock’s “Rockit” music video. All of these are in service in making him a pancake breakfast with scrambled eggs which he quickly ditches for some Mr. T breakfast cereal.

Pee-wee’s stolen bike

Pee-wee has the greatest bike in the whole wide world, the envy of everyone, especially the rich kid in town, Francis (Mark Holton). Pee Wee chains it up good, but that doesn’t stop it from being stolen while he’s in a bike shop. Pee-wee descends into madness, spouting wild theories as he shows inconsequential evidence to his friends and neighbors. We later see him in downtown during a rainstorm, stomping around like the Frankenstein monster. A Death Wish-style gang tries accosting, but they run away when Pee-wee snarls at them. A psychic tells him his bike is in the basement of the Alamo. 

Hitchhiking

Pee-wee does the sensible thing and hitchhikes to get to San Antonio. The first guy who picks him up is an escaped prisoner named Mickey who comes off as a violent criminal who probably has murder in his background.

Next is Large Marge, a lady trucker who recites a haunting story of a bad highway accident. She tells Pee-wee to let the other truckers know that Large Marge sent him and you won’t believe the terrifying conclusion to this scene! It’s so scary!

Movie Studio Chaos

When Pee-wee discovers that his bike is being used for a Warner Bros. movie, he steals it back and chaos ensues all over the Warner lot.

At some point during the chase, we have a speedboat with Santa Claus and Godzilla chasing Pee-wee Herman and crash right in the middle of Twisted Sister video. Instead of prosecuting Pee-wee, the execs at Warner Bros. want to adapt his story into a movie starring James Brolin and Morgan Fairchild. Pee-wee’s Big Adventure is a perfect movie and a delight from beginning to end.

Jeff Shuster (episode 47, episode 102, episode 124, episode 131, episode