The Curator of Schlock
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The Curator of Schlock #255: Wilson
The Curator of Schlock #255 by Jeff Shuster Wilson It’s pretty good. I hope everyone had a good Christmas. I made some of that Hobo Chicken in the microwave made popular by Frank Whaley in the John Hughes’ classic Career Opportunities. I played Smurfs on my ColecoVision for the better part of the day. Still haven’t managed to… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #254: The Sweetest Christmas
The Curator of Schlock #254 by Jeff Shuster The Sweetest Christmas Run, run, run as fast as you can. We’re on week 4 of our Hallmark Christmas extravaganza, a celebration of what one can do with G-rated made-for-TV movies financed by a company that makes its bread and butter off of Christmas Tree ornaments. We… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #253: A Royal Christmas
The Curator of Schlock #253 by Jeff Shuster Hallmark’s A Royal Christmas One of these things is just like the other. Earlier this year, I partook in the pop cultural sensation known as Crazy Rich Asians from director Jon M. Chu, a story about a commoner from the United States who falls in love with a supremely… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #252: A Wish for Christmas!
The Curator of Schlock #252 A Wish for Christmas Be my most tasty little dish! Thus begins week 2 of our Hallmark Christmas Movie Yuletide Extravaganza. I love these movies. They’re like the cozy sweater vest of American cinema. If only they would have a marathon of them in an IMAX theater. I want that… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #251: A Christmas Melody
The Curator of Schlock #251 by Jeff Shuster A Christmas Melody All I want for Christmas is poo. I’m still reeling from last week’s column on Raw, a French/Belgium production about the trials and tribulations of two sisters who happen to be cannibals. Sometimes you gaze into the abyss and it gazes right back. Other… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #250: Raw
The Curator of Schlock #250 by Jeff Shuster Raw I’m not moving to France. Each year, I try to cover a cannibalism movie the day after Thanksgiving as a means to gross out my readership after they’ve gorged themselves on candied yams and other assorted delicacies. But I may have bit off more than I… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #249: Holiday Movie Preview 2018
The Curator of Schlock #249 by Jeff Shuster Holiday Movie Preview 2018 I’ve got nothing. I was going to cover 2018’s Skyscraper from director Rawson Marshall Thurber. It stars Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson and Neve Campbell. There are evil terrorists trying to burn down the world’s tallest building located in Hong Kong. The Rock’s character has a… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #248: Peppermint
The Curator of Schlock #248 by Jeff Shuster Peppermint Jennifer Garner as Mrs. Vigilante. This must be the year of the vigilante film. We had the Death Wish remake with Bruce Willis, which was pretty good. We have that Death Kiss movie coming out starring a “Robert Bronzi,” but we all know someone out there in tinsel… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #247: Day of the Dead
The Curator of Schlock #247 by Jeff Shuster Day of the Dead: Bloodline Three times is not the charm. Okay, Halloweenies. Your Curator of Shock is here with wrap up October with the George Romero classic, Day of the Dead. Get ready for zombies that say hello to their Aunt Alicia and prepare to eat… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #246: Rings
The Curator of Schlock #246 by Jeff Shuster Rings Ring-a-Ding-Ding! I’ve been putting this off. 2017’s Rings from director F. Javier Gutiérrez is the movie responsible for Paramount cancelling the next installment of the Friday the 13th series of films. Apparently, Rings was supposed to be their new cash cow annual horror film series with… Continue reading
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