The Curator of Schlock
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The Curator of Schlock #18: I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus
The Curator of Schlock #18 by Jeffrey Shuster I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus You know you’re not doing well when the Christmas movie you’re watching for your weekly blog makes the Christmas movie reviewed for last week, The Night They Saved Christmas, look like a minor masterpiece. But you have a duty to present… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #17: The Night They Saved Christmas
The Curator of Schlock #17 by Jeffrey Shuster The Night They Saved Christmas: No “Jingle Bells” Ever! Let’s talk about heresy. I know it’s a term that’s fallen out of fashion in modern times, but it exists and pretending that it doesn’t, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Santa Claus has been maligned, draped through the mud,… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #16: Cannibal Apocalypse
The Curator of Schlock #16 by Jeffrey Shuster Cannibal Apocalypse, AKA Invasion of the Flesh Hunters I tried to think of a movie to review for Thanksgiving. I know many of you are looking forward to munching down on succulent turkey in a few days, but have ever been tempted to sink you teeth into something… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #15: Chernobyl Diaries
The Curator of Schlock #15 by Jeffrey Shuster Chernobyl Diaries: Free Beef Jerky Included With Tour! I’m a sucker for cheap DVDs. Amazon was having a blowout sale the other week of $5 dollar DVDs. I purchased Falling Down, Up In Smoke, and Flashdance. And then I bought a $4 dollar DVD, Chernobyl Diaries. I remember… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #13: Running Man
The Curator of Schlock #13 by Jeffrey Shuster Running Man (20 Seconds: Your Head Explodes) No, this is not a review of the 1987 action movie The Running Man starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Maria Conchita Alonso, Yaphet Kotto, and Richard Dawson. This is not a review of that dystopian science fiction movie set in a future… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #12: Phenomena
The Curator of Schlock #12 by Jeffrey Shuster Phenomena Many will cite Suspiria or Deep Red (Profundo Russo) and Italian director Dario Argento’s cinematic masterpieces. To be sure, those are fantastic films, journeys into the macabre shot in glorious Technicolor, the last of their kind before the process came to an end in the late… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #11: The House by the Cemetery
The Curator of Schlock #11 by Jeffrey Shuster Freud + Frankenstein= Freudstein (The House by the Cemetery) 1981’s The House by the Cemetery from Italian horror maestro Lucio Fulci starts out with a couple of teenagers getting brutally murdered in (you guessed it) a house by the cemetery. How are they murdered? Well, the one… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #10: The Hand: A Story about a Phantom Limb (Mwa ha ha ha ha)
The Curator of Schlock #10 by Jeffrey Shuster The Hand: A Story about a Phantom Limb (Mwa ha ha ha ha) 1981’s The Hand is a psychological horror movie starring Michael Caine. Over here at The Museum of Schlock, we typically thumb our nose at psychological horror. We want blood and guts and zombies and devil… Continue reading
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The Curator of Schlock #9: Beyond the Door (The Child Must Be Born!)
The Curator of Schlock #9 by Jeffrey Shuster Beyond the Door: The Child Must Be Born! This month, I’m The Curator of Shock, serving you up some super scary movies. I hope you’re ready! First up is 1974’s Beyond the Door, a very freaky movie about demonic possession and demonic pregnancy. It’s The Exorcist and Rosemary’s… Continue reading
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