The Lists
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The Lists #27: Horror Movies Sure to Be Released in the Next Decade
The Lists #27 by John King Horror Movies Sure to Be Released in the Next Decade The Befouling The Thing Next to the Other Thing Arbor Day Hypno-homicial Apocalypse of the Purple Land The Stupefaction Bloody Souls The Mutilation Diaries Nicholas Sparks’s The Wumpenbooble The Thing Next to the Other Thing 2 Paramecium What the Continue reading
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The Lists #26: Yams Recipe
The Lists #26 by Patrick Jehle Yams Recipe Take yams out of cryogenic yam storage. Contemplate your failures and sins. Peel yams. Remove any unsightly spots by digging them out. If a spot gets bigger as you dig, keep digging. Dig, donkey! The hole will get bigger and darker. Do not look directly at it Continue reading
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The Lists #25: How I Do My Bird
The Lists #25 by Patrick Jehle How I Do my Bird a. Stalk, disarm, and smother a swan until deceased. 2. Exult. 3. Learn to forgive yourself. 3. Stuff bird generously with explosives (whatever you have around the hovel). d. Put in the oven and flee the house. 3. Strip, flap, soar, weep, and be Continue reading
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The Lists #24: Some of the Worst Adverbs in the English Language
The Lists #24 by John King et. al. Some of the Worst Adverbs in the English Language In On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft, Stephen King (no relation) warns that “the road to Hell is paved with adverbs” (118), based on the idea that a more precise verb, or the more careful context of Continue reading
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The Lists #23: Take the John King OK Cupid Quiz
The Lists #23 by John King Take the John King OK Cupid Quiz I’m madly in love with my wife, so I am off the market, as it were. But yesterday I came across this in my files, from the era before I met her. So this quiz is a thought experiment to see if Continue reading
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The Lists #22: Eleven Things Said to Me on Actual Dates
The Lists #22 by Scott Hoffman Eleven Things Said to Me on Actual Dates 1. (Sends me a text to meet him at a bar at 10:30, so I show up.) Me: “Hi, I got your text.” Him: “What are you doing here?” 2. Him: “I met another guy. But it might not work out. Continue reading
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The Lists #21: Lyric Reflections
The Lists #21 by John King Lyric Reflections All those years, and I felt foolish. I had gone around with total self-assurance that Jewel’s hands were, in fact, my hands, and I was so proud of myself for having four hands, two of which were pretty nimble with guitar playing. It turns out they were Continue reading
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The Lists #21: Disturbing Books
The Lists #21 by John King Disturbing Books Recently a listicle, 10 Books for the Literarily Disturbed, appeared on Feed Your Need to Read. Now I adore most of the books Renata Sweeney placed on that list (Tropic of Cancer is in my sweet spot), but found the adjective disturbing wrong somehow, even when describing Continue reading
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The Lists #20: Top 10 Suicide Notes
The Lists #20 by Brett Pribble Top 10 Suicide Notes 10. Just finished watching the finale of LOST. I give up. 9. Remember all those cat photos I posted? They were a cry for help. 8. I really thought you’d notice my haircut. 7. Only seventeen people wished me Happy Birthday on my wall. Just Continue reading
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The Lists #19: Noah’s Log
The Lists #19 by Brett Pribble Noah’s Log Day 1 It’s kind of sad to watch everyone from my village drown, but it’s sweet to be able to say I told you so. Day 17 Still annoyed that I couldn’t get the unicorns on the arc in time. Day 35 Sometimes I wonder why my Continue reading
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The Drunken Odyssey is a forum to discuss all aspects of the writing process, in a variety of genres, in order to foster a greater community among writers.
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